Trust in Me, I will provide, and I will be glorified.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1
This journey to bring our little girl home has been nothing short of extreme dependency on the Lord. Whenever we felt the need to even take the slightest control of our adoption journey, God quickly reminded us that He was in control and would whisper in our hearts, "Trust in Me, I will provide, and I will be glorified." After our previous adoption fall through, our hearts were confused, sad, but extremely hopeful that God was still good and our little girl would be right around the corner.
Well, on November 14th, I received a phone call about a birth momma, Shannon, that was due at the end of December. I wasn't sure if about the timing, but felt we should say yes. Let me back track a minute. About a week before this, I had a vision, as I was standing in the kitchen watching my boys stir batter at the counter together. In that vision, I saw Nick on the right, Elijah in the middle, and a little girl of caucasian and African American mix on the very left. I knew right then and there that God was revealing to me our daughter. Back to this call. Mom is caucasian and dad is African American. Whoa!! Of course, Jon and I were hopeful, but extrememly guarded and cautious with hearts, not telling anyone of this situation possibility. We gave over to the Lord and moved forward. I look back at my journal and I remember pleading with God, please bring our little girl home before Christmas.
On Novermber 15th, we got an e-mail stating the Shannon had not chosen our family. A bit discouraged, we moved forward and rested in the hands of the Lord.
Then, on November 18th, I got a call saying, "Shannon didn't necessarily not pick your family, she hadn't chose any family. You see she wanted a biracial couple, but we did not have any, but she really likes your family and wants to pray about it a little more." We had a small bit of hope and found our prayer warriors to help stand in the gap for us.
On November 20th, we got a call saying that Shannon wanted to move forward with our family and really loved us! She also wanted to have a conference call with Jon and I! I was abosolutely thrilled!! You see, God had pressed into my heart that this ministry not only included our new little one but her momma and family. This would definitely be a more open adoption which would give us the opportunity to minister, love, and show God's redemption and grace to the momma and family. My prayer started becoming, "Lord, please begin a beautiful relationship between Shannon and I and direct our conversations, filling with your love and peace."
On November 25th, Jon and I were blessed to have the opportunity to talk with Shannon over the phone. It was amazing! Shannon has the most grateful heart and kept telling us how thankful she was for us and how we were an answer to her prayers. We were so blessed and so ready to have her as part of our family. After about a 20 minute conversation, we all decided to talk again the following Monday. We were so excited, yet still decided to share our wonderful news.
November 27th, Shannon had a doctor's appointment to check on the baby. Her doctor noticed that baby girl was extremely large and possibly already 8 pounds and told her to think about an iduction or a c-section. Of course this scared Shannon quite a bit, so her response was that she was going to pray about it first before she made her decision. We started praying for peace for Shannon and the decision God would place on her heart.
November 30th, we shared with our families about Shannon and asked for continued prayers for Shannon and her family.
On December 3rd, I had the opportunity to talk with Shannon again and I was blessed beyond belief!! She was so sweet and are hearts definitely connected. I also had the honor of praying with her over the phone and it was such a blessing to my heart! She did ask me to pray about the c-section, because she was very nervous about this and really did not want to do it. At this point we were unsure whether Shannon would fly to Utah or stay put in Georgia. This conversation blessed me so much and I was so grateful to start bonding with her. She also asked me if I would be in the delivery room with her, too. I was ecstatic and completely floored!
On December 5th, we got a call saying that Shannon may have the baby on Friday or Monday. With all of the weather coming into Dallas that night, we sat and waited and start packing. We waited all day to find out whether or not we needed to leave or wait. At about 5pm, our caseworker called and said she was flying out to be safe and it was up to us of what we wanted to do. We were very concerned about getting stuck and missing the birth and not being able to be there for Shannon that God granted us the last two seats on the last plane going out of Dallas to Atlanta. We met our caseworker at the airport and drove two hours to Augusta.
On December 6th, our caseworker was able to take Shannon to the doctor, in hopes of scheduling a c-section. After hours of being at the hospital, they decided not to do the c-section, but were doing a ton of tests. There were tons of communication problems with the hospital and doctors. They came back saying the baby is breech, very large, and lots of fluid. They were trying to determine if baby was safer in or out. At this point the caseworker realizes that Shannon has gestational diabetes and her blood pressure is high.
On December 7th, Shannon stayed over night at the hospital, but they are releasing her for the night. They ran lots of tests to make sure mom and baby are okay. She will most likely go back on Sunday or Monday morning for more tests and is being monitored very closely. Doctor is suppose to schedule a c-section for Monday or Tuesday if baby's lungs are developed after an amino test was done. We prayed her lungs were developed. That evening we had the opportunity to have dinner with Shannon and her two children! It was amazing!! We love her and her two kids are so sweet and smart. She has such a grateful heart. She already has a plan for her and her kids after baby is born in hopes of getting better schools and better place for the them to grow up. She is very thoughtful and such a kind heart.
On December 8th, Shannon went back to the doctor with caseworker. Shannon and baby were doing great! Lungs were developed!! BUT..the doctor never scheduled the c-section and now cant get it scheduled until Thursday morning!! We considered flying home to see our boys, but financially it did not make sense. My heart was crushed, yet hopeful still. So what now? We wait.
We are still, here, in Georgia, awaiting the arrival of this little girl that has decided that a dramatic entrance is something she insists on. Shannon hasn't waivered in her decision to place and loves us as we love her. We are so blessed to have Shannon a part of our family and continue to pray for God's peace throughout this entire journey.
We ask that you stand with us and not only pray for us, but for Shannon. She has an amazing heart, but still struggles with anxiety. Pray God's overwhelming peace for her and for us. I will do much better about keeping this journey update, but this is where we are... WAITING on the Lord. Trusting in the Lord. Resting in His timing so that He may be completely glorified.
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,so is my word that goes out from my mouth; It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:8-12
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