Grace

"Amazing Grace how sweet the sound..." "Hallelujah, grace like rain falls down on me..."

From the moment I woke up, this song played through my head.  Love this song.  God must have truly wanted me to remember his grace for me today, because He kept speaking this into my heart.  This morning was not unusual for our family, except that I had to get Nick moving a little quicker for an orthodontics appointment in Dallas this morning.  Our morning...our Monday morning, was rough.  Nick didn't seem to cooperate with anything I asked of him and we were running late!  "Nick, for the one hundredth time, please put on your clothes or we will be late!"  "Nick, why are you not dressed? Nick, where are your clothes? Nick....Nick....Nick.... (must I continue to get my point across?).  I was stressed and we were finally headed out the door with my patience spent and my frustration level high. Where are the keys?  You have got to be kidding me.  It took us another 10 minutes to locate the keys after calling Jon, who had them yesterday, and getting him on board the frustration train to finally get us in the car and on our way....LATE!  "Please...no talking to mom...I need to refocus, calm down, and find the peace I need to get us to Dallas."  Whew!!  Another exciting morning in the Stewart household!

So...no grace in that is there?  Just wait!  We get to the hospital...nearly running..and Nick says, "mom, I love you."  Grace (after yelling at him all morning.)  In the orthodontist's office, Nick talking to the hygienists, "That's my brother.  He's so cute, right?  We are going to a pumpkin patch, soon.  You should go too.  My brother loves them.  This will be his second time to go.  The animals make him happy."  Grace.  As we are walking out of the building, "Mom, you are the best mom, ever!"  Grace.  As we are getting into the car, "Mom, I'm ready for us to have another baby...a girl this time!"  Me: "Oh really?  We have actually been praying a lot about that Nick and believe God will bring the path to our feet very soon.  What would you name her?"  Nick says, "Grace.  Don't you just love that name, mom?"  All right, Lord..I hear you loud and clear!  Your Grace is enough for me today!

Later, as I get home and get Elijah settled into his nap, I get an unexpected, yet very welcomed call from my dad.  He read my last blog entry about Nick, and said, "Your such a great momma to those boys!  Your mom would have been proud!" Grace. We talked more about what was happening in our lives and the word Grace kept popping into my mind.  I told my dad that we were praying about starting the adoption process again, because God was strongly urging us to bring another orphan into our home and he said, "Don't you have enough going on? "  me: "of course, but God never called us to be comfortable, He called us to follow him and trust Him, and we have to do that, plus my heart longs for these children."  My dad: "Well, you must bring home a little girl!"  I then went on to explain how Jon was nervous about it, because finances are extremely tight with me staying home now, but was able to remind myself and him that somehow, God has been faithful and provided everything we needed because we continue to walk in faith with Him.  We cannot see what God is doing on paper, because God works above that.  Stop looking at the accounts and what is not in them and start looking at what God has done and will do!  My talks with my dad seem to be encouraging on both sides of the conversation or least I hope they are.  I love that my dad will listen to my rambling and love me just the same. I share my heart with him and he begins to see into the heart of God for my family. His love for our children has grown so much and I am so grateful for that!  Another example of God pouring his grace onto our relationship.

 Regardless of our wavering faith, God's grace is poured out on us every single day!  I see it everyday in my life with my children.  I hope you can too!  Again, God never said following His will be easy or comfortable, He only said, He would be with us and would always provide what we needed!  I stand firm in this knowing God's call is so much bigger than I could have ever imagined as a young girl and I am so excited to be part of God's plan!!

This being said, please begin to pray with us as God's hand begins to move and draw our feet to his path of adoption again!  It seems a little more scarier, but a lot more exciting to me!  Now, Jon may not see that, but I love the adventures God has this family on!  We will let you know when the calls are made to step out in faith to start the process over again, because we will definitely need support and God's GRACE to get us through this next one!

Under God's Grace,
Tiffany